We found him sitting at home ,
hosting his little pity parties ,
hating himself , and tragically eating his sorrows away .

First we needed to shave a few pounds off .
Not only for aesthetics and his well-being ,
but because finding decent clothing
for a man his size can be a bitch !
We didn't starve thre poor Guy ,
he needed only to eat smaller portions ,
refrain from eating late at night before bedtime ,
and stay away from those dreaded dairy products !
The results of the weight change took only
two months !
Of course , everbody needs a haircut ,
but since he is also genetically blessed
with the ability to sprout facial hair ,
we easily persuaded him to let grow a beard.
After growing to a manageable length ,
Someone worked their magic little clippers ,
and shaped a goatee and some killer sideburns .
Of course , no makeover is complete
without one of our infamous shopping sprees
(naturally within our ghetto budget) ,
and we gleefully burned most of his old wardrobe ,
which looked like Circus tents in size and color .
We added some Black clothes , and Presto ....

Damn , the formerly Wimp-Fatty
is now the macked Pimp-Daddy !

Not only does he feel 100 % better ,
but most importantly , his self-esteem has soared !
Now he receives compliments out of the blue ,
gets more e-mail than Mr. Bill Gates ,
and more p*ssy than the Humane Society !
You go , boy ! We are all proud of you !
And we're glad we were part of it all .

Here's the 'Before' and 'After' again...

Wow ! We've created a whole new Person !
And a much better one , I must say .

examples

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